“You play
the ball. You do not play the opponent. Be free in your head. Be free in your
shots. Go for it. The brave will be rewarded here.”
-
Roger
Federer, Tennis Legend
You must be
wondering why did I quote Roger Federer in a Gandhi titled post instead of a
typical Gandhi quote on his death anniversary (30 January). I want you to pause at this moment and read
the above quote again, mainly because most of us just read through viewpoints
without really considering the merit of the words written. Roger is probably
referring to an action in the mind, a state of mind of winners which you may
associate with success. In short you’d find it attractive. Now I would like to
draw your attention to the quote below by Gandhi.
“Man and his
deeds are two distinct things. Where as a good deed call forth approbation and
wicked deed dis-approbation, the doer of the deed, whether good or wicked
always deserves respect or pity as the case may be. Hate the sin and not the
sinner is a precept which though easy enough to understand is rarely practiced,
and that is why the poison of hatred spreads in the world. ”
-
MK
Gandhi, India
Though most
of us would believe that to even analyze some brave statements made by stalwarts
like Gandhi would mean you have to be like him or live a life as pristine as
his. I, however, differ on this. To me every legend comes with special
blessings that he/she is able to expand and live up to its acme. None of us are
same as they; does that mean we reject all their ideas?
I am not
here to debate Bapu’s idea if a slap should be retorted back by forwarding
another cheek to be slapped again - as goes by a famous Gandhi quote in hindi.
But I do want to content the idea that Roger rekindled in my mind about
Gandhian philosophy being considerate when facing adversity.
Any kind of
adversity is basically a challenge inside your head. Your enemy, your stress,
your circumstances could be one of them. When faced with sudden changes or
deliberate slow painful recovery, how and what tops your priority list while
responding to that challenge – reveals who you are.
When Roger
hits the ball, he doesn’t imagine hitting the opponent for hitting the opponent
would neither make him any better player nor would it help him to score better.
If anything it would desolate his game. Similarly everyone (not some but almost
everyone) when faced with an adversity in life chooses first to blame the doer
before he/she reacts to the situation. It is incomprehensible for us to believe
that the doer and deed might be two different things and in reacting to the
doer we spoil our response to the deed. Hence, Gandhi’s philosophy to be aware
and considerate towards your adversity.
I am not
trying to tell you that you put up with oppression or tolerate unto death.
Those are extremes I can give no opinion on, but what I can definitely bring to
notice is a side of untouched human behavior. Righteousness that refuses to
accept that we too have the same components inside us to do as much bad as the
doer of the wicked deed did, this refusal is the pitfall of the society today.
In simpler words when we refuse to recognize that we too can be sinner at times
(at least to some extent) due to our righteous perception of “Self”, we refuse
compassion to the very result we want to generate and we refuse our own growth.
Any kind of
growth needs direction in space and nourishment. The direction of the space (positive
or negative alignment of intentions) and kind of nourishment (feelings) decides
the fate of our growth. In short, to understand our adversity from a vantage
point of compassion will feed our growth with compassion and understanding,
while feeding it with anger and aggression will create cancerous surge. The
doer, people in pain can do painful things. Only those who have been hurt can
hurt others. Simply acknowledging their pain and then responding to their deed
can open floodgates of creative responses and spur our own growth. Take into consideration
case of Julio diaz (his story - http://www.huffingtonpost.com/2008/04/06/man-buys-dinner-for-his-m_n_95178.html
) who was just mugged by a masked teen on his way back to dinner. He could have
blamed the doer as a wicked drug addict teenager who stole his money and left
him hungry. Instead his compassion led him to recognizing the need of the
mugger and eventually his own growth in experience.
Though this
may not work all the time, I confess it is not easy either but it is those
fleeting moments when you realize that as much as you recognize you have
components of the bad then you also recognize you have components of the good,
your true power. All of this without being judgmental about the doer. This is
liberating. It is when you realize that anger, hurt, pain, frustration is just vacuum
created by absence of love and compassion. Your true power is in like Roger
says hitting the ball not the opponent; your true power is in knowing you
cannot control the doer by being judgmental against him/her, it is in knowing
that you are exercising your choice when you face the deed and resolve it rather
than trying to correct the doer. A Harvard Psychologist and TEDtalk star Amy
Cuddy puts it in her book PRESENCE “ A truly confident person does not require
arrogance, which is nothing more than a smoke screen for insecurity”, could
this also be said about groups? Us, we as a society ?.
Where
can you use it right now? For the time being try it on American President D.Trump.
Instead of trying to focus on rhetoric of Trump 24x7, the global community
could address the underlining fears against immigrants. Had Gandhi been alive
he would have probably done Prarthna Sabha or prayer for Trump, to fill his
heart with more faith and love or given him roses like our bollywood movie
Munnabhai MBBS to get well soon or called on to him to discuss his doubts and
fears. Biases cannot be fought with biases, biases are created because there
are mis-understanding or mis-representation of facts. Humans being logical are
inclined to search for the truth, the illusion of which coming from the other
side tricks us to believe that the larger group always speaks the truth. The
story of Ramayana, Lord Ram or Gandhi’s inspiration was epitome of this
leadership. While he recognized and waged war against the mighty Ravana for
kidnapping his wife Sita, all through the Ramayana he never once uttered any
ill word against Ravana giving utmost respect to the strength and knowledge
Ravana had. Ram attacked the sin not the sinner, he played the ball not the
opponent. Ram could free his mind and his Ego, thus he was the Purna Purusha “the
complete being”. Can we even try?
