Health is not just about being physically healthy, sometimes without us knowing some things creep up inside us with our thoughts they stay , create loops of similar patterns and then we realize this only when people tell us "you have changed".
Here is a list of few questions that will help you determine if you are healthy from within.
1. Are you always worrying?
2. Are you unable to concentrate because of unrecognized reasons?
3. Are you continuously unhappy without any particular reason?
4. Do you lose your temper easily and often?
5. Do you have wide fluctuations in your moods from depression to happiness, back to
depression, which weaken you?
6. Are you troubled by regular insomnia (sleeplessness)?
7. Do you continuously dislike being with people?
8. Are you upset if the routine of your life is disturbed?
9. Do your children consistently get on your nerves?
10. Are you irritable quite often and constantly bitter?
11. Are you afraid without any particular reason?
12. Do you feel that you are always right and other people always wrong?
13. Do you have numerous physical aches and pains for which no doctor can find a physical cause?
If answers to any of these questions if definitely "yes". May be then it is time to renew and cleanse your thought pattern.
13 comments:
answer to many of these questions is "yes" shreya but where is the answer to remove these questions from our lives permanently-life is a grind and you can't help being grounded if you want to be finer:-)
@Suruchi.... WOw !! lovely pic ..i thought i'd open up to answer but i couldn't resist compliment you. :)
Ok now coming back to your point. You can really be finer without the grinding if you let yourself be like water. :)
I agree that removing these permanently is difficult but not impossible. We all have doubts but they don't stop us from learning some skill. We stop learning when we have set our minds that we won't be able to do it.
The basic direction of all these questions is "we try and control others", which is why often we lose cool get irritated , let frustration harbour inside us without our knowing.
There is definitely a way we need to just look out for it. :)
Dhoondne se to Bhagwan bhi mil jate hai :) yahan to sirf khud ko dhundna hai :)
adios
Very interesting points. Thanks!
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@Anonymous .. Welcome. Thanks for your comment.
well very few would be sure about saying no to your posted questions! :)
my opinion being that 'mental health' as you may call it is something you cannot be sure of.Life gives you these in phases and such reaction I assume are perfectly normal.I think more than changing the thought process,its about dealing with these changes and thoughts.Its more about spending time with oneself and these factors are an indication that your mind needs attention too like your body.It needs to be exercised..
you have to deal with what you are actually within.The more the people run away from themselves,the greater the chaos and confusions.
so if there is a 'yes'..go spend some quality time with yourselves is my view..
enjoy writing.. :)
well
@Prashant.. Well I have a question before i begin to answer you. How do you plan to take care of your physical health like for example you know as age increases you may have cholesterol , sugar , bp etc so what do you do ?
A: wait for the day doctor declares that you have these diseases and then exercise out whole day to cure them.
B: you are a health conscious person so you exercise regularly for half hour.
:) See even though you know that exercising all your life might not 100% save you from diseases but being an aware person you do it because the chances of these diseases happening to you reduces to mere 1 or 2%.
So awareness helps.
What you are saying for "Mental health" is quiet opposite. Yes one cannot be sure of "mental health" sometimes or some way we do get irritated and react without much understanding. But presuming that these reactions are normal is equal to saying that having diseases is normal.
Yes in today's context even that is quiet normal people spend all their life taking pills but they cannot enjoy complete health.
Similarly every sudden reaction spoils complete happiness in life.
Is it normal ? Ok to live with?
Just like physical exercise is a daily routine so does mind needs it every day, Food for thought kind. Spending time with own self every day and not just when change happens decreases these sporadic behavior.
In return assures long staying happiness and not just HIGH's of life which people get when they run away. :)
Hope i could clarify myself.
Thanks for your comments.
adios :)
there is a point you justify me and that 's what differentiates mind and body.You can be sure of your body if you are excercising and taking care.But when it comes to mind,there are very few presumptions you can make.How can you be sure,assuming that you have been good with your views and mind,if someone else takes you to a situation which you could not help??
you are bound to face the situation and then is when you really give thoughts to things that makes you mentally tougher!
such thoughts would be a rarity in a normal situation..
basically what I was disagreeing to the fact that one should change thought process as said by you.well again I see as running away from oneself.Its more of building ones thought process with the help of such situations.
and in the end,its like we are beating around the same bush.. :)
in the end its being trueself within and spending time with oneself..
and I perfectly agree to the point that one should daily give some time to his/her thoughts.that would make you feel good..
So gist being be good!think whenever you can and keep blogging..:)
@Prashant.. If somebody else takes me to a situation ? Situations are an external stimuli they are bound to come , let say somebody cheats me i.e a situation. I feel bad and hurt is my response.
Now the point comes why I feel bad? Because I expected the other one not to break my trust. So I expected .. I created a thought process where i believed that I would be happy if that person stays loyal and honest to me.
That is why i believe it is the thought process that can make you feel good or bad. If in the beginning of anything we can change our belief to understand that we cannot control anybody or least if we can prepare ourselves for worst in every situation, then later after a situation like this we wouldn't have to a repair work.
Changing thought processes that every one is expected to behave like I expect or expecting only best from everything or blindly desiring something without understanding other opinions can help us avoid going through pain.
I aint saying it is a day's work but regularly giving time to oneself and creating thoughts like these help make us stable when external stimulus is applied. It is indeed like vaccination that avoids diseases and trust me it works. :) Long term effects :)
Anyways again you are free to take it in a different way I prefer to prepare myself and take control of myself than depend on a situation. It is not 100% yet but I am sure of getting a good control on myself may be after few years.
Sure I would keep blogging about these stuff.
Thanks for offering your comments here and giving me a scope for explanation. :)
adios
Hi shreya,
I feel all the pain we go through is because we "Expect". If you have no expectations, you will never get hurt. BUT, can we live without expectations? Supposing i call a person 10 times but that person doesn't even bother to call once what should be the inference?
Also, i feel getting hurt is far better than feeling guilty. many times it is false guilt, i mean though we know in our heart of hearts that the other person was very unreasonable. we will hurt for a couple of days but at least we can have a peaceful sleep. what do you say shreya? do you call this a doormat syndrome?
@Nirmala... You know nirmala the journey of spiritualism is all about self awareness unlike how people explain it is about customs, it matters more if you know yourself better.
Now I don't know the exact relation you are talking about when you say you call a person 10 times so i would try and explain it in an e.g. I feel is best to explain its extremity.
Let take a mother and son relationship. Being a mother you know all your life you have loved your son, nurtured him given him everything he expected from you. And now comes a time when your son has all grown up has his family and kids takes care of them. But has completely forgotten about you, he hardly calls you on requirement he merely gives you money and lets take a step ahead he even talks badly to you.
What does a mother do ? feel rejected and hurt right ? She knows she loves her child and can never think bad for him yet somewhere she feels she never deserved this behavior. This for all the pain she took all her life for this son?
In short she expects or deserves a better behavior.
Nirmala going by what I think she would eventually slowly cut her contact with her son yet she would breed that hurt in her heart and keep feeling that pain. That is what a normal person would do.This in hindi is said "Abhiman".
Now let us reverse back some 20-30 years back when this son of hers was born. What were her thoughts then that affected her life now.
Our parenting that we see with our parents teaches us that we have to do something for our children for some 20-30 years and after that it is the duty of the child to take care of parents. So NEW parents slowly and UNKNOWINGLY harbor dreams of love and affection that their child would give them after 30 years. Slowly and steadily after each work that mothers inspiration was today I am doing this for my child someday my son would do it back for me. She got up 5 am made tiffins, she got his dress stiched, took care of him in illness and health. In her subtle thoughts she made her happiness of future motivation for today.
Nothing wrong in doing that but today after 30 long years her thoughts and her dependency on her child is causing her hurt.
The point to understand is every other person is an individual and you don't know how they will react even you give them everything you have, even your child is an individual.
Love is all about giving and keeping yourself independent at the same time. Being pushy and expecting only increases pressure.
The mother here has to ask herself what is more important to me ? my abhiman or my child ?
If my ego is more important then why feel hurt at all. Your child is wrong completely then this is the punishment he deserves.
If my child is more imp to me then as a mother I have the capacity to continue giving him irrevocable love continuously. How long can the child avoid his mother's loving words?Keep giving loving energy a time will come when you wouldn't have to go to him he'd come to you. Mother is the only one who a child expects to understand everything, how can you let your ego over shadow that. Ask yourself.
Selfless love never changes its meaning no matter what relationship you are under, but I don't mean blind loving. Give and protect yourself is important but expecting and getting hurt gives insecurity.
Nirmala doormat syndrome comes when you stop valuing yourself and that happens when you let your happiness depend on somebody's action.Even if the other person is unreasonable keep doing your actions with genuine love and keep explaining without expecting to find peace in day. Relationship will slowly find a way out if it still doesn't don't breed hatred. It is good to keep a clear heart and go to sleep peacefully.
Sorry for long and yet late reply. If you want further clarification I can still explain do let me know. You can also choose to mail me if you want. :) Hope this helps.
adios
Thanks a ton shreya for the reply.
I was just talking about expectations in general. i was not talking of any relationship in particular.
i feel, a mother's love should always be unconditional. If whatever she expects happens, she should feel happy...if nothing happens, she should not feel sad either....but we are all human na shreya..we expect love and affirmation from everyone...sit and sulk if it is not forthcoming...
my philosophy is...dont expect anything from anybody and dont hurt anybody...i know in the process of not hurting anyone, you will hurt yourself and the other person will always think that he or she is right!
Thanks once again for your patience shreya.. :)
patience is all I have Nirmala :) Just a small thing always know just like you create pain for yourself through your expectations everybody else does the same. If anyone is hurt it is because they "expected" so even if in front of them you accept that it is your fault, within inside you must always know that you are not guilty because it is not your job to keep fulfilling their expectations but rather them to keep their expectations in limit.
adios :)
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